by Ian Oliver


Although my book Getting Back on Top: The Uncensored Guide to Sex, Dating, and Relationships After Divorce mainly deals with getting back into the dating world after divorce, I originally began my consulting as a financial advisor. Many of my clients would come to me before their divorce to seek guidance with their finances before beginning the divorce process and had an array of questions when it came to dealing with financial issues during a divorce. Here are a the top 10 Financial things you should know and do when considering or going through divorce.

  1.  Know where all your accounts are and have copies of the most recent statements. Know who the accountant is and estate planning attorney and have copies of the last few years’ tax returns.
  2. Meet with several divorce lawyers before discussing it with your spouse. Any attorney your spouse meets cannot be your attorney due to conflict issues.
  3. Plan how your estate planning will change. Once divorced, if you pass, and you are not remarried, then the estate tax on your assets kicks in. So it is a very different scenario than when you are married
  4. Examine what your real expenses are going to be so you can know what you will need. Also examine kid’s expenses. Knowing those numbers will be very important in the divorce negotiations.
  5. File separately from your spouse as soon as possible after consulting your accountant. You want to become financially separated asap.
  6. Keep careful track of any cash at home or elsewhere as well as other valuables like gold or jewelry and make sure it is divided properly when the time comes.
  7. If your estate planning attorney or accountant has any history with or allegiances to your spouse, replace them immediately. You want everyone on your team to be loyal and committed to you.
  8. Be prepared to split every asset that is splittable. You want to sever as many financial connections as possible from your spouse.
  9. Interview new potential financial advisors as you may want to switch especially if the ones you have have an allegiance to or history with your spouse or if you aren’t very comfortable with them.
  10. Discuss with your current financial advisors as well as the prospective ones how your asset allocation might need to change in your soon to be new financial circumstances.

According to the APA about 40 to 50 percent of marriages in the United States end in Divorce. And the pain of divorce is one of the most traumatic events a person can experience and advice is abundant and often confusing.

I have not only been there and done that, but was inspired by working with couples, initially on their finances, but eventually I would find myself working with them and helping with their relationship transitions and seeing the impact that the advice I shared with them had on being able to transition better into a life out of matrimony.

What you should know is that the fear and confusion eventually diminish and as long as you are prepared properly you will see that the excitement for the future can become fun and the process of igniting a new life after divorce can be invigorating.


Ian Oliver has advised and guided individuals and families with comprehensive relationship advice and is a blogger for Huffington Post Divorce.


His new bestselling book, Getting Back on Top, was inspired by the work with these couples as well as his own post-divorce journey.   Author Ian Oliver

In addition to his passion for and commitment to helping couples transition into the single life, Ian devotes a large amount of time to children-related philanthropy through organizations such as Promises2Kids, Voices for Children and the San Diego Children’s Museum among others.

100% profits from this book to these and other selected U.S. based children’s charities.

Ian lives in Manhattan Beach, California. When he’s not writing, advising, or spending time with his kids, you can find him in Bikram Yoga or on the beach or traveling.

For More information visit his website at

Like him on Facebook at

Follow him on Twitter @getbackontop

Get his book from Amazon

Tagged with: