florida family law changes 2023

Florida Family Law Changes You Should Know About (2023)

Florida family law changes took effect recently.  Here you have the highlights of some significant changes to alimony and timesharing.

Please note that the online statutes, which you can find here from the Legislature have not been updated as of the date of this blog entry. 

Alimony in Florida 2023

The most significant change in alimony law in Florida is the elimination of permanent alimony.  You can still ask for bridge-the-gap alimony; or rehabilitative alimony, which is now capped at 5 years.  The legislature added temporary alimony to the alimony statute. 

The amendments made significant changes to durational alimony.  The provisions now include a cap as to how long you can get it, depending on the length of the marriage. It also added a formula or guideline as to the amount that you can get, which is to be calculated using your net income and that of your spouse.  Specifically, the cap is 35% of the difference in net income as calculate using the same formula as child support for calculation of net income.

Finally, which type of alimony you can claim will depend on how long you have been married.  A short-term marriage is defined as anything less than 10 years; a moderate-term marriage is one that lasts between 10 – 20 years; and a long-term marriage is 20 years or more.  Durational alimony cannot be granted in a marriage that has lasted 3 years or less.

There were no changes as to when you can ask for alimony, meaning that just being married, alone, is not the requirement that will get you alimony. If you are asking for alimony, you have to prove that you have a financial need for it.  It is not just a question of checking boxes and asking for the particular alimony you think you qualify for.  Additionally, you must also prove that your spouse has the financial ability to pay alimony.

Florida Family Law Changes to Timesharing

There is now a presumption of 50-50 timesharing when it comes to children in divorce or paternity.  This presumption can be eliminated if you show the court that such a 50-50 timesharing would not be in the best interest of the children.

New Support Statute for Dependent Adult Child

The Legislature created a new provision for the support of dependent adult children, Section 61.1255. 

Under this Statute, parents have a legal obligation to support an adult child who is dependent due to a physical or mental incapacity that began before the age of 18. This is really not a new obligation since this obligation was already recognized under Florida case law.  This new statute provides a framework, or guidance, as to how to calculate the financial obligation.

In addition, the statute is designed to work in furthering the right of a dependent adult child to obtain and/or qualify for any available federal/state benefits programs.  It explicitly provides that the child support guidelines used for establishing child support before the age of 18 do not apply.

You can file a suit under this statute at any time after the dependent adult child reaches the age of 17 years and 6 months, unless there is already an order of support in place.  Any support ordered to be paid under this statute would be paid to the dependent adult child, or an agent of the child under a durable power of attorney, or a aren’t or other person for the benefit of the dependent adult child.

Conclusion

These Florida family law changes caused quite a bit of disagreement with some.  By knowing about them, you can better prepare yourself. Those of us who practice family law have been busy with seminars to ensure that we are up to speed on what our clients may need.  While I provide the above as a summary of the changes you should not rely on what I described above.  You should consult a family law attorney in your area to provide you specific advice, tailored to your situation, if you have any questions about this changes and how they may impact you.

money-divorce-fees

Divorce Fees: How to Avoid Spending $15,000 in Your Divorce

Paying high divorce fees is usually the result of not understanding how divorce actually works in the legal system.

On Monday, I represented a client in a divorce trial.  This couple is not a wealthy couple.  They are hardworking people with decent earnings, and they have older children.

At trial the Husband testified that he estimated he spent between $10,000 and $15,000 in legal fees.

Because of scheduling issues related to the pandemic and the court, this divorce took almost two and half years to get to trial.  Technically, the case is not over yet because the judge has to issue the final judgment, letting the parties know how he will divide the marital property and debt.

I represented the Wife.  She tried repeatedly to settle the case by keeping less property and keeping more debt.  She wanted the case to be over.  As far as I’m concerned, she was the more reasonable party, not because she was my client; but because she understood how long a divorce can take to go to trial.  She also understood the cost in time and money only to end up waiting for a stranger—the judge—to make decisions about her life with only a few hours of information gathered from the evidence presented.

Avoiding High Divorce Fees

Many couples headed for divorce misunderstand the divorce process as to cost and available options.

These misunderstandings include:

  • Divorce trials are very expensive.  It is not about legal fees only.  It is also about the cost of getting evidence to prove your case. Trials are not decided only on what you say—your testimony—or on any old paper related to your assets or debts.  You have to go through a process to get documents that can be admitted into evidence.  To get these papers, you have to pay to serve subpoenas for those documents, and then pay the company or party for the cost of providing those documents.

The above process is just preparing for trial.

  • Second, before you get to trial, there are all sorts of problems between you and your spouse that may force you to go to hearings before a trial.  Hearings are a lot like mini-trials.  That means more legal fees, more costs, etc.
  • Divorce laws and judges give you a way out of expensive divorces.  Our Florida divorce laws let you short-circuit the divorce process by entering into an agreement.  What’s more, judges require you to go to mediation before trial.  Mediation gives you an opportunity to settle the case before you go to trial.   This will save a lot of time and possibly a lot of money in fees and costs.

But you don’t have to wait to be ordered to mediate in your divorce.  You can do a settlement before you even get into court.  Or even after the divorce is filed but before getting an order for trial.

Getting Your Divorce Done Without a Trial

The process to getting your divorce done without a trial is what an uncontested divorce is all about.  Uncontested divorces are all about negotiating with your spouse, either directly or with a lawyer helping you.

An uncontested divorce doesn’t mean you give up rights or necessarily get less.

It does mean that you know what your rights and obligations are under the law.  For this, you will most likely need a divorce lawyer.  It also means that you make decisions about your divorce keeping in mind those rights and obligations.  And then you negotiate, keeping in mind that neither you nor your spouse will have a great likelihood of getting everything they want in a trial.

There is a Spanish saying that roughly translates to “a bad deal is better than a good lawsuit.”  I have to agree with that, even though I make my living as a divorce lawyer.

Conclusion

You have options for your divorce, other than just opting for a long and expensive process.

If you are considering a divorce and want to explore your options for an uncontested divorce for a flat fee, please visit MiamiDivorceOnline.com.  You can read about how to get it done without a trial, and even make an appointment right on the page to discuss if this option is available to you.

On the other hand, if you suspect your spouse will litigate no matter what, consider a case assessment session to evaluate your situation.

onlne-divorces

Online Divorces – What They Are and How to Do Yours

Online divorces are possible thanks to the courts continuing to adopt technology.  When you understand what a true online divorce is, you can take advantage of the technology for your divorce. The idea is not only to streamline the judicial system, but to better serve those who have to use the system.  As with anything legal, though, online divorces are not just a matter of touch or click options provided.

What are online divorces?

Below you will find examples of situation when an online divorce may be advertised.  What they all have in common is that the divorce is one that is uncontested; that is, there is no litigation.

The definition of an online divorce will depend on what you, the party looking to get a divorce, is looking for.

Examples include the following:

  • Doing your own divorce – If you are looking to do your own divorce, you will find businesses who prepare forms advertising their online divorce services.  Their version of online divorces is one in which they provide you completed documents, and you do the rest, including filing the divorce.
  • Doing your divorce with an attorney but going to court – In this situation, an attorney prepares all your paperwork without you having to go into their office.  On the day of the hearing, you appear in court with the attorney.  This is usually found in Florida counties that do not provide the ability for an uncontested divorce to be done without a hearing.
  • Doing your divorce with an attorney with no court hearing – In this example, all the paperwork is prepared without you going into the attorney’s office and also without having to go to a court hearing.  Several counties in Florida offer this option.

Requirements for an Online Divorce

Online divorces are divorces are all about a “how” to get it done.  It is about the processing of your divorce through the legal system.

An online divorce still has the same requirements as a divorce for which you have to appear in court.  If you have minor children of the marriage, you must still satisfy the requirements of a parenting plan and setting child support.  If you have property and debt of the marriage, you must still divide those during the divorce.  Of course, the Florida residency requirement must also be met; you have to be living in Florida for at least 6 months before filing.

If you and your spouse enter into an agreement, then your divorce is uncontested and a great candidate for an online divorce.  If you have children, you and your spouse agree on a parenting plan and set child support, and also agree as to how to divide property and debt, you also have a divorce that is a great candidate for an online divorce process.

Where to Get an Online Divorce in Florida

Online divorces are not available in all Florida counties.  Sometimes you can get an online divorce in another county, even if your county does not offer that process. To find out if your county offers it, you would have to check with your local family court.

The Biggest Benefit of Online Divorces

Doing your divorce without having to go to court is already a great benefit.  Doing them for a flat fee instead of having to pay hourly fees is even better.  The combination of an online divorce for a flat fee provides you the benefits of less stress, a quicker divorce, a no hourly legal fees.

Conclusion

The bottom line is that online divorces are legitimate if your county divorce court offers it, and you and your spouse want to work together to get it done.   Or if you can get it done in another county in Florida.

If you would like to find out more about our flat-fee Florida online divorces, without a court hearing, regardless of where you live in Florida, visit Florida Divorce Online from Anywhere in Florida.

If you live in Miami-Dade, Broward or Monroe Counties, Florida, and want to find out about our flat-fee online divorce with no court hearing, visit MiamiDivorceOnline.com.

Contested or litigated divorces cannot be done without court hearings.  If you are about to face a contested divorce you can ask for a case assessment session to find out about your rights and what you are facing in your divorce situation.

When to Use a Divorce Lawyer or Mediator

In a divorce, some couples ask themselves whether they should use a divorce lawyer or mediator.  A divorce lawyer is not the same as a divorce mediator.  Their roles in a divorce are different.  What’s more, a divorce lawyer and a mediator are sometimes present in the same divorce.

Should You Use a Divorce Lawyer or Mediator?

divorce-lawyer-or-mediator

As with most legal questions, the answer depends on your specific situation, the relationship with your spouse, and what you each want to accomplish. On the one hand, mediation can help you avoid litigation and do an uncontested divorce.  On the other, a divorce lawyer can help you with an uncontested divorce.

Below you will learn the difference between a divorce lawyer and a mediator.  Understanding the difference between them and their role in a divorce, will help you decide which to use.

The Role of a Divorce Lawyer

A divorce lawyer in a divorce represents one party.  Your lawyer can only represent you in your divorce, they cannot also represent your spouse. 

This is true even when you have an uncontested divorce.  If you have an uncontested divorce, your lawyer may represent you and do the divorce documents for an uncontested divorce.  In this case, your spouse may choose not to use a lawyer; but the lawyer doing the documents on your behalf only represents you.

If, for whatever reason, your uncontested divorce becomes contested, your divorce lawyer will represent your interest in the case.  They will take steps to secure your rights to property, and your rights as a parent.  At trial or final hearing of your divorce, your divorce lawyer will only represent you.

The Role of a Divorce Mediator

Divorce mediators are trained as neutral professionals to help you and your spouse communicate with the goal of reaching an agreement in your divorce.  A mediator cannot represent either party. 

In Florida, many divorce mediators are also divorce lawyers.  A mediator is prohibited from providing legal advice during a mediation even if the mediator is also a divorce lawyer.  When you attend mediation, with or without your lawyer, the mediator cannot provide you any legal advice, even if the mediator is also a divorce lawyer.

In Florida litigated divorces in Miami, you and your spouse will be ordered to attend mediation before a trial or final hearing date.  The idea is to provide you and your spouse one last opportunity to reach an agreement to avoid a trial.  Trials are expensive.  Trials also take longer, and can cause delay in getting the time needed on a judge’s calendar.

When to Use a Divorce Lawyer or Mediator

You can use mediation before filing your divorce in court. At this mediation, you can also use a lawyer to represent you or mediate without a lawyer. It’s important to understand that your spouse must also agree to mediate.  If your spouse does not agree to mediate before filing for divorce, then you must file for divorce.  If you reach an agreement, your divorce will be an uncontested divorce, and be resolved much faster than a litigated divorce.

As mentioned above, a judge will order you and your spouse to attend mediation before giving you a trial date in your case.  In this case, if you reach an agreement during mediation, then your divorce will also end as an uncontested divorce.

Conclusion

You can use a divorce lawyer or a mediator depending on your case.  If you and your spouse have an agreement, you can use a divorce lawyer to do an uncontested divorce.  In this case the lawyer will represent you and do the documents with the terms you want.  You can also choose mediation before filing the case in court because you do not have an agreement; but your spouse must also agree to mediate.  Lastly, you can file for divorce with a divorce lawyer if you do not have an agreement, and your spouse does not want to mediate.

As a divorce lawyer, I can provide uncontested divorce services as well as representation in a litigated divorce.  If you would like more information, please call 35-710-9419, or provide your information for me to contact you.

divorce-lawyer-online

Divorce Lawyer Online- How to Find Legitimate Legal Help

Using a divorce lawyer online for your divorce can save time and thousands of dollars in the entire process.  But searching online for a divorce lawyer will also bring up ads that are not from lawyers.  These ads can frequently appear right along with those of legitimate divorce lawyers.

Making sure a divorce lawyer online is a lawyer

Only a licensed divorce lawyer can provide you legal advice for your divorce.

All attorneys in the US need to be licensed.  In Florida, The Florida Bar licenses attorneys.  A person who holds themselves out to you as a lawyer must be licensed by The Florida Bar.  Moreover, practicing law without a license is illegal, but you can still find some people holding themselves out to the public as lawyers in some areas.  For example, immigration is an area where scams are easily found.

If you’re looking for legal advice from anyone online or on the phone, you can always search at The Florida Bar website to see if they are licensed attorneys, before you contact them.

Affordable help for divorce

Florida tries to make legal assistance affordable.  To do this, the law allows for persons who are not lawyer to provide assistance in filling out legal forms, such as divorce forms.  In some counties, like Miami-Dade, for example, the Court has a self-help program where you can get legal forms.  You cannot get legal advice from the self-help staff because they are not lawyers.

Getting help from another source is also possible, so long as you understand that persons who fill out forms are usually not lawyers.  They cannot provide you legal advice.  When they help you fill out any legal form, they must include information that lets you know whether they are lawyers.  If they are not, these forms usually include a paragraph for the non-lawyer to indicate that the name of the person who helped you complete the form and is not a lawyer.  It also requires them to include their name and information.

How to Know if You Need a Divorce Lawyer

There are instances when you can do your own divorce.  There are other instances where you may need the help of someone to prepare divorce forms so you can do your own divorce.

You may need the assistance of a divorce lawyer if you have questions about your divorce circumstances.  These questions may be about property, debt, children, child support, and any number of things that worry you about your circumstances.   The answers to these questions may be provided by Florida divorce laws, which involve legal advice.  Answers to questions that provide legal advice is what lawyers are licensed to do; they have the training in law to provide that advice.

As divorce lawyers online, we are able to offer legal help for divorce more efficiently for clients. Online divorces are also more affordable because technology reduces cost. 

Even courts now use technology, such as the Zoom virtual platform, for hearings. So even family court can be described as family court online.  In contested divorces, we routinely represent parties at hearings using virtual platforms.  Mediation and depositions are also using these virtual platforms.

Conclusion

Online advertisements make it easy for you to get the help you need for an online divorce or just about any other legal assistance.  But you need to make sure you can get the service you need from a trusted source.

If you are interested in doing your divorce online, contact us. 

alimony laws in florida

Alimony Laws in Florida in 2022

Alimony laws in Florida have been a target for amendments for several times in the last 10 years-none of them have been successful and only 3 have made it to a governor’s desk.  Yesterday, June 24, 2022, Governor DeSantis vetoed the latest attempt to change alimony laws in Florida.

Some with pending divorce cases, and many thinking about getting a divorce in Florida, should be feeling relieved.

Below are details of what the bill would have changed, the current alimony statute, other factors for alimony, and the two-part test for asking for alimony.

How Alimony Laws Would Have Changed

Under the bill, SB 1796, passed by both Houses of the Florida Legislature, there would have been several important changes.

These changes included:

  • Prohibiting permanent alimony
  • Limiting how long you could receive alimony in marriages of 20-plus years to no more than 75% of the marriage length
  • Limiting rehabilitative alimony to 5 years
  • No durational alimony for marriages of a duration of 3 years or less, unless the receiving spouse was disabled or a full-time caretaker of disabled children of the parties

You can read more at this Summary Page.

Current Alimony Laws in Florida                                                       

Florida’s alimony law is set out in Section 61.07, Florida Statutes.

It’s important to understand two things about alimony in Florida.  The first is that just because you are married, it doesn’t mean you are automatically entitled to alimony.  The second is that alimony is a right of both spouses, not just women.

The reason women are awarded alimony more often than men is not because there is a bias in the laws in favor of women.  It is due to the fact that most women make less money than man.  When we do the calculations for alimony, we are usually using a higher income for men and a lower income for women.  I have had cases in which the wife did have to pay alimony to the husband.

Florida law currently provides for:

  • Temporary alimony during the litigation.  See Section 61.071 of the Statutes.
  • Bridge-the-Gap alimony, limited to 2 years.  Its purpose is to help one party get back on their feet right after the divorce.
  • Rehabilitative alimony, currently with no limitation.  The purpose of this type of alimony is to help a party establish the capacity to support themselves.  For example, finishing college, vocational training and the like.  By its very nature, the duration will be limited..
  • Durational alimony is defined rather confusingly.  The statue defines it as alimony which is not permanent alimony.  It is simply alimony for a certain amount of time (a duration) and could be applicable to a short or long term marriage.
  • Permanent alimony is just what it says.

Alimony and the Length of Marriage

Section 61.07 establishes a tier of sorts for alimony based on how long you have been married.

Marriages that are less than 7 years in length are considered short-term marriages.  A marriage that has lasted more than 7 years but less than 17 years is considered a moderate-term marriage.  And, finally, anything above 17 years is considered long-term.  You start counting from the date you got married to the date the divorce action is filed.

Other Factors in Alimony Laws in Florida

Besides the above, you have to consider certain factors set out in the Statute that will also impact an alimony decision.

Things like the standard of living during the marriage, the contribution by each party to the marriage—and we are not talking about money only here.  A contribution by one spouse to staying home taking care of the children and other being a “housewife” or “househusband” (yes, there are househusbands) is a significant contribution that allows the other party to go out and pursue their careers.

How Do You Get Alimony?

Now that you know the framework, this is the test for alimony-which is a two-step test.

To be able to get alimony, the first step is that you must need it financially. This means that from a financial standpoint, you will not be able to make ends meet unless you get financial help from your soon-to-be- former spouse.

The second step is that the other spouse must be able to afford it financially.

It is impossible to provide anything other than a general and simple example.  Alimony is very fact-specific to individual cases.  If you realize that you will need financial help to meet your expenses, but your spouse barely makes minimum wage and together you are having a hard time meeting your joint expenses, the chances are not good that you will get any alimony.

Conclusion

While this year’s crop of laws did not give us a new alimony law, we will most likely see another attempt at change.  I bet that within the next 2 years we will be facing this issue again.

The trend in alimony for the last 15 years or so is toward limiting it. The current statute (passed in 2010, I think) implemented looking at the length of the marriage, and came up with durational alimony but still left in place permanent alimony.  This latest attempt was going to do away with permanent alimony. 

How We Shape Our Experience When Getting a Divorce

In searching for information about getting a divorce, the problem you will face is what to make of all the information you’ll find. You will find helpful information, and some that is contradictory. 

It is not helpful, either, to hear more from people describing their divorce as a war, and less from those who have taken a more proactive and positive approach.

The problem is not really about the legal process as such. It is more about your role IN that process if you and your spouse have been discussing getting a divorce.

Getting a Divorce begins With This Simple Fact

The only available grounds for divorce in Florida is that  the marriage is irretrievably broken.  All this means is that the marriage is not working for the person who wants to file for divorce. 

We lawyers will not ask you why you or your spouse want to file for divorce.  A judge in a divorce trial will never ask you why you want a divorce.

The phrase “irretrievably broken” does not assign blame to either spouse in a divorce. Nevertheless, you will find plenty of divorcing couples who choose to litigate as if one or the other of them was at fault when filing for divorce.   

Divorcing couples who choose to litigate keep many a divorce attorney in business, even when we advise on a course that is less litigious.  The alternatives is to work with your spouse on getting it done without litigation, or as little of it as possible given the specific situation.

Alternatives to litigation can help you

Over the years, we have seen the introduction of alternatives to litigation in family law in an effort to reduce litigation, such as mediation and the collaborative process.  These options are available for your divorce even before you file in court, but many people still use litigation as their first option.

The goal is not simply to save money when getting a divorce.  The main goal is to reduce the emotional toll of divorce on the entire family, especially if there are minor children in the marriage.  Long after you have left the courthouse and we lawyers have moved on to other cases, you and your former spouse will have to parent the children, learning to get along and work together.

Where Do You Fit Into the Process?

You, as a party to a divorce, may not realize that you and your spouse are the ones in charge of your divorce from the beginning.  You have the power to get it done in a way that causes the least stress, and does not involve huge sums of money litigating. 

In a Florida divorce, you can agree, litigate, mediate or collaborate.  The process of divorce itself will be as difficult or as easy as you choose to make it.  The choice is yours.

Divorce is often described as an emotionally traumatic event in someone’s life, equal to the death of a loved one. This is true for the spouse who wants a divorce as much as for the other spouse, assuming the other spouse wants to remain married.

Our emotions about the divorce will influence how we get a divorce in terms of choosing litigation or a less difficult and expensive path.  We often don’t think clearly when we are dealing with strong emotions brought about by resistance.  Sometimes, we may not even be aware that this is happening.  It is understandable, then, why we can make our own divorce a difficult one.

But you still have a choice.  Which process you choose will impact you emotionally and  financially  to a lesser or greater extent.

You can also call 305-710-9419 or email me.

mental health awareness resources

Mental Health Resources: Taking Care of Yourself and Your Loved Ones

Taking care of ourselves and our loved ones includes looking after our mental well-being.  Even though May is Mental Health Awareness Month since 1949, there are many segments of our community where mental health issues are still somewhat of a taboo or not deemed important.  The reality is that we all suffer the consequences of ignoring our mental health issues as well as that of others around us.

How to Help Yourself Deal with Mental Health Issues

We all suffer from days when we have “the blues,” or just feel down or out of sorts.  When we seem to always be feeling this way, it’s probably a good idea to take a closer look at what we are feeling and what may be causing it.

There are many things you can do on your own to foster a healthier mental state. These things range from simply doing  exercise or physical activities, talking to a friend you trust, and even changing your environment temporarily—perhaps going for a walk in the park or the beaches.

When these things don’t seem to work, it may be time for you to bring up the issue of how you’re feeling with your doctor or therapist.  You also have available resources locally and nationally which can be a source for you to seek help.

The important thing when we feel severely depressed or facing any other mental health issues is to know that we are not alone.  This may sound trite or be a cliché nowadays but it is nevertheless true.  It is true because we are social beings.  As such, we look to see ourselves reflected in those around us, we learn from each other and we seek comfort from each other.

Helping Your Loved Ones

In my opinion, nothing beats paying attention to our loved ones, being observant.  If you notice that your child, spouse, parent or any other loved one seems to be stuck dealing with an issue or mental state, please don’t ignore it.  Offer support and look for resources to help them and to help you help them.

Local and National Mental Health Resources

Whatever the mental health issue you or your loved ones may be experiencing, chances are that there is a resource available to help you or to begin looking for help.

The Suicide Prevention Hotline: (800) 273-TALK or (800) SUICIDE is a good one to keep top of mind.

At the local level in Miami-Dade you have:

NAMI Miami-Dade:  This is the Miami-Dade organization part of the National Alliance on Mental Illness.  They provide free mental health support, including crisis and suicide prevention assistance, connection to a trained crisis counselor you can reach 24/7 by text via their Text NAMI 741-741, group and online counseling.  The site also provides you additional resources.

Miami-Dade County Public Schools –  Our children are specially vulnerable because they don’t have the tools or agency to take care of their mental health, but you as parent or caretaker can do a lot.  The Miami-Dade County Public Schools provide resources to help you help your child. Visit their Mental Health Services  where they have webinars available 24/7 for students and parents in English, Spanish and Creole, and other resources.

At the state/national level:

National Institute of Mental Health.  Besides having resources for you to reach out to, they also have information on a variety of mental health related topics.

NAMI.org is the national organization of which NAMI Miami-Dade is a part.

FloridaHealth.gov Mental Health Disorder Resources – If you can’t find what you are looking for when you search your city/county for mental health resources, you can search on this page.

The important thing to remember is that there is help for just about any mental health issue or situation.  Whether it’s you or someone you love/know, any situation can be more manageable by taking action to look for help and support.

divorce with children or paternity case

Litigation in a Divorce with Children or Paternity Case

Litigation in a divorce with children or paternity case deserves special attention.  I’m not talking about legal strategy; I’m referring to the children involved in these cases.

In litigation, it is easy for the needs of children to get lost in the litigation.  It is important to keep the best interest of the children front and center.  This is not easy to do, given the emotional turmoil that a contested divorce or paternity can evoke in each of the parents.

Prior to the litigation, you and the other parent were part of a team, living under the same roof and making joint decisions for your children.  The only thing that changes in that scenario is that you may not be living under the same roof.  You are still parents and can still be an effective team for the sake of your children.  Of course, this is different if there is child abuse or neglect.

What’s in the best interest of your children?

Not surprisingly, family courts have this question in mind front and center when they have divorces with children or paternity cases to resolve.  It is good for you to keep in mind that the divorce and paternity law and, therefore, family judges, prefer that you and the other parent work together to minimize conflict as it relates to the children and to agree as much as possible when it comes to children’s issues.

It is difficult to provide more than a general roadmap as to what is in the best interest of children.  Your family may have issues relating to a child that other families may not have.  Similarly, no one knows your children and their needs better than you do.  This is why courts prefer that you and the other parent work together for their sake, regardless of what other challenges the divorce or paternity case may have.

What Courts Consider when it comes to Children

No matter how much we family lawyers may counsel clients to work with the other parent as to children’s issue, we sometimes still have to try these issues.

The Courts are guided by factors set out in the applicable statute to help them make decisions as to support of the children, parenting by both parents and timesharing by both parents with the children.

Still, you and your family are better off if you can reach an agreement.  Regardless of whether your case is a divorce with children or a paternity case, you and the other parent should be able to agree on issues that directly affect a child.  Again, no one knows your family –your children—as you do.  These statutes are written to provide you, the parent, with as much discretion as is possible, assuming there are no issues of abuse or neglect.

Steps you can take in a divorce with children or a paternity case

There are a few things you can do for your children while in the middle of litigation:

  • Do not discuss details about the divorce or litigation. 
  • Do not restrict your child’s communication with the other parent
  • Do not use a child as messenger between you and the other parent.
  • Do not speak ill about the other parent to a child; and do not let anyone speak ill of the other parent to the child.

Seek professional help or information if your child is having problems adjusting to the new circumstances. A professional can provide you specific advice according to the child’s age

Take the Online Parenting Course Early

As a parent in a family case with children, you are required to take a parenting class.  The idea behind this class is to stabilize the family as they transition from an intact family into, essentially, two families.  This class provides you information that can be a starting point in helping your children deal with what is happening.

estate-planning

Estate Planning – How to Protect Yourself and Your Family

Estate planning shares an important characteristic with fire drills and other emergency planning:  the best time to deal with an emergency is when there is no emergency.  This is why schools, institutions and many businesses conduct fire drills. 

Simply put, estate planning involves making arrangements for your property to be disposed of in the event of your passing or disability. It can include a will, sometimes a trust; and advanced directives such as a health care proxy, living will and durable power of attorney.

The number one misconception about estate planning is that only the rich need it; the second one is that it is very expensive to plan your estate.

Regardless of whether you think your estate is large or small, what to do before the actual emergency can save us stress in many ways.  Perhaps the best stress relief is knowing that we have a plan, even when we don’t know what the emergency itself is.  We take care of the unknown by creating our own plan as best we can.

Estate Planning and Your Family

You can take to ensure that you take care of your family by providing a straightforward path for them to inherit your property, sometimes (but not always) without probate.

Similarly, you can take to help your family make decisions about your care when you are ill or disabled. This would include not only guidance as to medical decisions for you, but also taking care of your finances while you are ill or disabled.

For example, for an illness that incapacitates us in some way, we may need help from family to manage our healthcare. In this instance, we can use health care directives and a living will. For financial issues, we can have a durable power of attorney.  Lastly, a testamentary will lets us decide what we want to do with our property once we are no longer here.

None of us likes to think about these things.  And, frankly, with our busy lives, many of us do not think about these things. We usually give them a passing thought when we hear of family members dealing with these issues after a loved one has been ill or passed away.   

When we have these documents in place, we also take care of our family.  We give them direction, a path that allows them to avoid “what ifs” and other unsettling questions. This will be important for them during moments that are emotionally stressful for them too.

If you have none of these documents, or don’t know know which ones you need, but would like more information, but want more information, call me at 305-710-9419.  You can also email me so we can discuss these issues.